Journal of Unpublishable Results

Dear Dr Hollich, we regret to inform you that we must reject your groundbreaking study on a highly interesting and important topic due to some flaws the two reviewers and I were able to find. While we understand these flaws are true of virtually all published studies, we chose to highlight these flaws in the review because substantive criticism takes more time and we have research to do as well and we are not getting paid or any kind of academic reward for our service…

It’s happened to all of us: the study to which you dedicated a significant portion of your life, apparently has a flaw (or two) that makes it unpublishable. Thankfully a helpful reviewer or editor has discovered these flaws. Perhaps we need a new journal to collect all these unpublishable studies. A kind of cautionary tale for new researchers.

After all, while you did spend years planning the studies, collecting data, and writing up the manuscript, the reviewers spent at least two, possibly four hours reading it and, honestly, that’s more time than anyone else will ever spend reading it… So if they don’t see the merit, why bother right?

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